The Monday Buttkick: How to Silence your Inner Critic

3 minute read
Author: SarahWHQ
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Heyyy, it’s us! Writers’ HQ! All up in your blog with some words about writing.

We’ve got a very important message for you right now, and it’s this:

Sometimes you have to stop with the excuses and just get the fuck on with your writing.

Mind blowing stuff, huh?

Is it scary? Yeah, sometimes. Is it boring? Also yes, sometimes.

Is it possible that someone you knew when you were 12 will read your story and sue you because they think it’s about them? Not really tbh.

Could you become so famous that your ex from when you were 22 will release the grainy pic of you in your undies? I mean, maybe. But let’s be honest everyone is naked on the Internet these days so who really cares and also you were super hot when you were 22, soooo ya know.

Is it terrifying to think about your work out in public to be judged and critiqued? Damn straight it is.

Could a critic break your heart? Sure, but suck it up because not everyone will like what you do and, frankly, what other people think of your work is none of your business. Your only job is to tell the story.

Could your inner critic break your heart? Sure, only if you let it win.

Look, my inner critic is basically insidious and persistent and twisted and evil. A kind of inverse-Yoda hellbent on convincing me of my own pathetic uselessness and inspiring in me only this strange inertia, in which the weight of my stories burns through the thin lining of my gut in their desperation to be told and yet I find my hands in a kind of stasis, unable to make the words appear on a page.

But listen, Sonny-ma-Jim. We’re not about to let no inverse-Yoda fuck with our plans for writing a story so vast and great that is catalyses the world into action against the greatest threats of our time. Or, for that matter, our plans to write a quiet, sweet story about a nice girl from the suburbs who meets a nice boy from the city.

Here’s what we’re going to do with all those naysaying voices today:

KICK THEM IN THE KNACKERS

Yeah! Let’s do that. Let’s all spend today like ‘hmm it might not be the best story ever written but it’s MY story and I’m sure as hell gonna tell it, so fuck you inverse-Yoda and your bullshit.’

From now on, let’s imagine all those fears and bad inner critic hogwashery said in the voice of someone who’s just inhaled a bunch of helium and see if it has the same effect.

Also knacker-kicking. YEAH!

Got it? Go write!

Sarah and Team WHQ

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